The Milestones We Don’t Talk About

When we think of milestones, we tend to picture the big ones: first steps, first words, first day of school. These are the ones we post about, the ones in the baby books, the ones pediatricians ask about at well visits.

But for many families—especially those parenting children with medical needs, developmental differences, or sensory challenges—the most meaningful milestones often aren’t the ones on a chart.

They’re the ones no one sees.
The ones you don’t even know to hope for until you’re in the thick of it.
The ones that feel small to the world, but massive in your home.

The first time your child tolerates brushing their teeth without screaming.
The day they finally stay at the table long enough to eat a full meal.
When they put on socks without melting down.
When they let you cut their fingernails.
When they use a new word—not on command, but on their own.

These are the moments that sneak up on you after weeks, months, even years of effort. They arrive not with fanfare, but with a quiet exhale and a lump in your throat. And unless someone’s walked a similar path, they may never fully understand the weight of that one simple act.

I remember the first time my daughter made it through a doctor’s appointment without having a panic response. There was no “milestone” sticker for that, no applause in the waiting room. But I’ll never forget the way she held my hand, the way I held my breath, and the way I cried in the car afterward—not out of fear or grief this time, but pride. Deep, rooted, soul-filling pride.

As a pediatric occupational therapist, I’ve celebrated so many of these unseen milestones with families:

• The first time a child makes eye contact.

• The first time they don’t gag at the sight of a new food.

• The first time they ask a question.

• The first time they ask for help.

These are milestones, too.

They deserve to be named. To be honored. To be felt deeply.

Because when we only celebrate the traditional timeline, we miss the richness of the real story—the one where progress looks different, slower, but no less profound.

So today, this is your reminder:
Whatever milestone your child has reached—however “small” it may seem—it matters.
It’s real.
It counts.

And you have every right to celebrate the hell out of it.

Even if no one else sees it.
Even if it’s not on a checklist.
Even if it took everything in you to get there.

Some of the most beautiful milestones aren’t measured in months.
They’re measured in courage, persistence, and love.

And that? That’s worth celebrating every time.